Loss is one of the hardest parts of being an adult. Coping with it might even be tougher.
Theres nothing wrong with admitting that we aren’t strong everyday and we aren’t perfect. This past year has been one of loss, great loss, a lot of loss. This past Sunday one of my beloved fur babies Chicken went over the Rainbow bridge. This was on top of losing my grandma two weeks prior, my good friend earlier this year and my boyfriend’s mom right before that.
Its ok to not be ok, I certainly am not ok. I am willing to admit I am not! The panic attacks, the reminders that are beyond overwhelming. I couldn’t go through the bank drive through yesterday cause thats what Chicken and I used to do together and it was too much and I might have burst into tears both writing this and when they asked why I came in instead.
As you can see he loved car rides (this is still my favorite picture from my old car), and was a happy little fluff muffin… ugh the tears and panic attacks keep rushing in while writing this post! Chicken told us it was time, he enjoyed one last sunset, said goodbye to his brothers and then we said goodbye.
This year has been incredibly difficult. There have been meltdowns, panic attacks and feelings of extreme overwhelm. I had several meltdowns while writing this very post. This has genuinely been one of the hardest years of my life and one of the years of the greatest loss. It feels like I’m losing everything.
Its ok to have bad days, its ok to have tough days, its ok to have days were you do absolutely nothing.
Its ok to be not ok!