In the past few months I have had to face two of my biggest demons. My chronic migraines, which leads to a whole slew of mentally dark places, as you can imagine being in constant literal blinding pain that never stops, and the medication with horrible side effects including insane weight loss (nearing 20 pounds and nearing what I weighed when I starved myself). I’ve gotten really good at hiding how much weight it really is.
The thing is I’m afraid of the judgement still, I’m afraid of the comments and the still body shaming that comes with sudden and unexplained weight loss. At the end of the day the demons will always exist, and that level of weight loss will always be a trigger (lets be real how can it not be one?). The “You look amazing” comments are always a trigger, I mean did I look disgusting before?
The dreaded scale…. Its such a double ended sword. I have to monitor the level of weight loss medically for my physical well being but I also have to avoid feeding my demons. This balance has been an insane struggle I can’t begin to explain to all of you.
So until I feel a little more comfortable in my new skin you may not see a ton more looks… they will be coming but new content on how to shop is still on its way incredibly regularly! <3